How can one will oneself not to be hurt. How possible is it to numb oneself to emotional pain. When is the limit reached? Can I push myself that far, what will happen when I can't take it no more. Do my walls come tumbling down? Questions questions questions ... An endless quest, for unavailable answers. So many more things the chugging gears of my mind want to ask, which most probably will be answered with "I dunno-s".

Karma. What goes around comes around. How I had treated other people, the confusion and the emotional hurt are all coming back at me, biting right at my tail now. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so shy and scared when it came to matters of the heart. I so very much want to set my mouth agape and just yak and yak on and on about what I feel and want, but no ... the pipe is choked with so much rubbish. I feel like I have a huge furball in my throat.

I hate crying. Especially when your eyes are already natural slits. You look awful. I want to climb out of limbo. I have weak arms that cannot hold my heavy self for a long time, can't be hanging on as long as I want to. I'm fat. I want something good out of this. I want some TLC. I want the mental capacity and concentration to mug for my exams. All the want-s in my world. All the disappointments that accompany them. Please get rid of the languor creeping within me, replace it with something joyful and cloy my senses.

I know this post has been very disjointed. Ah well, incoherence prevails once more.


-->Sheryl - Who Knows<--

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